Big news in my art world...

I won a commission of 12 paintings for Sharp Hospital.

I really can't believe it. I've been working so hard on completing it,

that I kind of forgot what a big deal it is for me.

Here was the first commission I won this summer.

12 big mixed media collage paintings
And they're big.

Really big.

Like 3 feet x 3 feet big.

This is the biggest painting
I've ever created.

And I love it.

I've been waiting and waiting until I finished them all
to post because I hate showing unfinished work.
I know what the finished piece looks like in my brain,
but no one else does.
So it feels a little naked.

But finishing 12 enormous paintings
takes longer than one thinks it would.
It feels like it's taking me forever.
Step by step.

So here you have it.
Here are my works in progress.

I used my photos from the
Washington coast at
Artfest last spring.

And it just reminds me

that one thing leads to another.

you know?

every single experience,

the good and the bad,

contributes to our story.

and are a piece of who we are.

and one thing leads us to the next thing.

which enables us to do the next thing.

one small act of courage

gives us courage

to move forward and

take the next risk,

which leads to the next thing...

starting a blog,

opening an etsy shop.

signing up for a booth at an art fair.

creating a proposal to teach.
all of it counts.

I'm finally digging up my last bit of energy
to finish this project
and deliver it
and move on.

Permission to Dream Big. Part 1

I feel like dreaming big
and sharing those big dreams with you.
There's some, no there's a bunch, of fear,
but I'm just going to
because I think it's important
for all us.

I am hesitant to dream out loud
And I'm trying to figure out why.
I think I associate dreaming big
with discontentment.
Greed.
As if what I have is not enough.
As if I want more, more, more.

But that's not it. at all.
Dreaming big dreams is not the opposite of contentment.
Unthankfulness is the opposite of contentment.
Contentment is rooted in gratitude. and peace.

And stuffing the dreams that God has planted in my heart,
Not using the gifts that he has given me
to fulfill those dreams,
is not humility.
It's fear and unfaithfulness.

I really believe that if I
lay my dreams down before the Lord
and commit them to him,
they may not happen the way I expect,
but his plans for me will always be better
than the ones I have for myself.
(even when I don't get it)

It's okay to dream big.
This is my bigger picture moment.

Shelley has been a huge inspiration
to me to not be afraid
to dream big
and to share those dreams
with you.

Kelly Rae always has great things to say about this.
Especially this post on abundance.

Creativity Boot Camp: Grow

Creativity Boot Camp
Day #5: Grow


So, I really, really wanted to participtae in
Creativity Boot Camp
to get my creative booty into shape.
But it's such a busy
(I hate the word busy)
but it's been a really full time.

The idea behind boot camp is to choose one medium
and create one thing a day within that medium.
And journal too. with words.

So, I'm just going to jump into days 7+8
and glue days 1-6 onto the back end...
if that makes sense.
That's the goal.


Ever since my class with
her at Artfest in March
I've wanted to explore
sharpies + watercolor + watercolor crayons
+ sewing fabric into my art + leaving some white space...
so that's what I'll be posting for the next 30 days or so.

I'm making something

I've had this little project in my head ever since I made these little pretties





in her class at artfest in March.



I will show you when I finish.
soon. hopefully soon.

I am where I am supposed to be

Limitations live only in our minds.
But if we use our imaginations,
our possibilities become limitless.
Jamie Paolinetti

The more I art
(as a verb, invented by Janne)
the more I realize that everything is possible.

Now I just have to figure out what I want.

I've been saying that over and over lately because
artfest kind of turned my world upside down.

i thought i knew what i wanted.

i thought i wanted to make my fortune doing what I love: making art.

But, when I got a little time and space to think about it at artfest...
i don't think that's what i want.

if i had a million dollars...

i would keep my job, part time.
i love my job.
i teach kindergarten 2-3 days a week with the best partner in the world.
i read and sing and paint and encourage and get hugs all day long.
and it's one of the most important jobs in the world.

and i feel about teaching kindergarten,
the way I feel about creating.
I feel like it's where i am supposed to be.
Like i was made for this.

plus it makes me shower
and iron my clothes
and feel like a real person some days.

In my search to find out what I want in my art explorations,
i have to start with what i don't want.
and i don't want what i thought i wanted...

when i consider trying to make a living creating art,
i think i could pursue it
if I put everything I had into it.
but honestly,
i don't want to work that hard.
i don't want to have to make art.
i don't want to have to travel.
i want to get paid for my time.
i don't want art to be another obligation,
but an outlet.

so now, maybe the answer lies in knowing what I don't want.

or maybe it's okay not toknow
just to wander
and linger
and explore.

So, what is it that you want out of this artful life?
Is it what you thought you wanted when you begna this adventure?
What have you learned.

I really want to know...

You can't get what you want til you know what you want.

Arfest Revelation #63:
What do I want?



Me: In a perfect wolrd, like a dream world... what would your artful life look like?

Angel: Ummmmm... let me think about it. What about you?

Me: Let me think about it...

I'm still thinking about it.
I thought I knew.
But now I know that...
I don't know.

And I think that's big for me because it makes me give up control.
It makes me open to letting my art take me where it wants to go.
It makes me open to God's plans for me, which I know in my brain are so much better than my plans for myself, but my hands keep clinching my own plans so tightly that it's hard to remember.
It loosens my grip on this gift He's given me and allows room for Him to work.

Somewhere in the Bible(Like the way I quote scripture?)it says...
we wait with eager expectation for the sons of God to be revealed...
and isn't that a way more fun way to live?
with eager expectation.
not knowing what God will do each day.

Oh, and it helps me stop this ridiculous striving.
enough already with the striving.
sheesh, you're killin' me.

just make art for art sake.
make art because it's your gift
and gifts are meant to be given away.
make art to make the world pretty.
make art to show the love of God.
make art to avoid folding the laundry.
make art to make yourself smile.

Anyone else struggle with striving instead of being?
or are all you guys past (passed?) that?

I have a secret to tell you.
Just you and only you.
Comments make me so happy.
Really, really happy.
Like when you get an email in your box that says "notification of payment received". that happy.
Like when you're new and alone with no one to eat lunch with
and then someone asks you to eat with them.
that happy.
That's what comments do for me.
And they're free.
I'm just sayin'.

These altered photos on wood were spontaneously inspired by the Port Townsend Coastline. It is so beautiful and so different then our coast line down here in San Diego. I loved the cold, windy, rocky, rugged coast with the pine trees everywhere. Beautiful, I tell you

mixed media collage... unfinished.

The good news: I'm a great starter. a dreamer. a visionary, if you will.
The bad news: Not so great on the follow through. If you know me, this is putting it mildly.

I have 17 started, unfinished projects. 17. My studio is filled with them. Does anyone else have this problem?

Can I blame it on genetics, or just total lack of discipline?

Here's what I'm working on...


This commissioned piece with her sister's original poetry as the text. So sweet. and...
FINISHED. yay me.


Part ofthe series I startedwith the commission. almost done.


another one of the same series. getting there...


same series. a long way to go.


These butterfly collages are for a birthday in February. 2009. yikes.



Artfest epiphany #46: Sometimes your art goes through an ugly awkward puberty stage. work through it.

How doing the business stuff makes me a better artist...

Artfest Epiphany #37

Doing the business stuff I hate makes me a better artist.

After talking with her on our 2 hour drive to from Seattle to Port Townsend I realized a bunch of stuff about the business side of art that I hate so much.

a.) It pushes me out of my comfy clothes, my little box, and into something a little scary. I keep running up against these fears. And I have to walk through them in order to do what I really want to do: make art. It's good practice.

b.) It forces me to go places I don't want to go and do stuff I don't want to do (i.e.figuring taxes out)which makes me realize that I can really go there. wow.
which translates to confidence in all areas ofmy life. hmmmm. deep.

c.) It makes me think differently, try different things, find new solutions, which is essentially what creativity is:finding different paths, no making different paths to who knows where...

and to grow as an artist I need to practice stepping outside of my comfortable place and risk failure. failure with paint and failure with gross business stuff.

So, isn't that so typical? The stuff I avoid is usually the stuff I need the most...

So, what are you doing to make yourself uncomfortable these days? I'd love to hear what you are thinking about.

Don't forget to sign up for the giveaway from the last post.

Luscious trades & a giveaway!

So, when you go to art fest people make hundreds of artish stuff to trade for other random artish stuff and everyone gets free stuff all over the place. This one was one of my favorites made by her.


Here are some of the delicious trades I got from artfest.
So, a trade can be anything. really, anything. from a piece of fabric to a paper mache heart on a wire to a poker chip. really. anything.

And what is better than getting free stuff... um. nothing, of course.



So, in the spirit of trades + free stuff fun, I'm having my first ever giveaway on my blog. You will win a matted, archival quality 8x10 print of yoru choice from my etsy shop right here. You win. You pick.

All you have to do is leave a comment on the best thing you've ever gotten for free. That's it. I'll pick a winner on Friday, so hurry up and comment already. Art is at stake here.

Artfest 2010

5 days of nonstop making, creating, relating, learning, and more making...
where do I even begin?
the people. the making. the conversations. the setting. pure bliss.


My favorite photo of the trip: a log on the beach filled with rocks. Fort Warden is on the beach. unbelievably beautiful.



Here are the dorms and the campus. It was cold and drizzly, perfect weather for coffee-sipping & art-making.


I met her in Seattle & shared a car to Port Townsend. Complete stranger who became a fast friend. I know I will see her again.
Here we are on the ferry going over to Bainbrige Island.


My first class was making prayer flags with her. I have her books. I love her style. I tried not to be too star struck. She's great + approachable, and guess what... a mere mortal, like me...in a good way.



I took a drawing + collage class from her. I heart her. big time. she is one of the best teachers I've ever had. ever. she helped me think about my work in a completely new way. She has this online class that is on the list...



Stayed up way too late every single night talking + laughing + creating with her and others. i loved this part because I am so used to making alone. isolated & in my zone. so to share this experience with like minded soul sisters was really cool. and pretty hilarious.




And I came home to this guy. yet another shamless pic of the booboo. i can't help it, okay?
here he is watering the orange trees and refusing to wear pants. can you blame him?

if you ever, ever, ever have the chance, just go.
it was life changing... it was a gift to me and I know that one day I will go again...